5472

As we conclude another trip around the sun, it is time for one of those obligatory look back pieces. 2013 was definitely not my favorite year. It was a year of trials and tribulations. It was a test of strength and character. It was a humbling year to say the least. It wasn't all bad though. With it, 2013 brought several high moments. I got to see my oldest daughter start high school. I got to see my youngest daughter hit the half-decade mark. I began a new job, while not by choice, has been a very good thing for me. As with every year, new people entered our lives and we said goodbye to others, whether they departed the earthly realm or just departed our lives. Whether your mark your year with a positive or a negative, I at least hope you learned something from 2013. I know I learned many lessons. I learned that the select few people I let close to me are there for a reason, they are truly great people. I learned that I am definitely not as smart as I think I am, but I'm way smarter than I give my self credit for. I learned that I need to apply myself more, and that with a little bit of work on top of the natural skills I have I will go further than I thought. I learned that more people are blinded by faith than I ever could have imagined. I've learned that despite having knowledge at our fingertips and on demand, people are still extremely ignorant. I've learned, that while it sucks to do, it's ok to ask for help. And most importantly, I think I learned to be me again. I was definitely lost for a while, but I'm working on getting back to the person I really am. While my lessons are surely not your lessons, hopefully we all come out of 2013 a little wiser, if not without a few scars to show for it. So as I ready myself to mark the 365th day off of the calendar, I wish you all a new year filled with discovery. I hope you all grow from whatever 2014 has in store for you, be it good (and I hope that it is) or bad. I hope that in 365 days from now we can all be in a better place, if not physically, mentally or spiritually. So adios 2013, and happy new year.

5760

One of the greatest things about being an American is that we have the freedom of speech. We can fully express our feelings verbally (or written) and not be subject to persecution for our beliefs from a legal standpoint (mostly and theoretically). It is with those freedoms understood that I think Phil Robertson is perfectly within his rights to say the things he has said recently. Another great facet of America is free enterprise. Companies can choose to align themselves with whatever groups or cultures they wish and build a brand based upon their own beliefs. It is with that understanding that I think A&E is perfectly within their rights to suspend the use of Mr. Robertson in their programming. You see, just because something is right for one person, doesn't mean it is right for everybody and A&E is choosing to remove Phil Robertson from their programming because they don't want to align themselves with his beliefs. I honestly don't see what the uproar is about. It's marketing. It goes on in business all the time. If a representative of a company or brand says or does something that said company or brand does not agree with, they part ways. While I personally feel that Mr. Robertson's comments are closed minded, archaic, and bigoted, I have no problems with him expressing his opinion. That is his right as an American. It is also A&E's right as a company to distance themselves from that image if they wish. They have a monetary stake involved and it is their right to protect their bottom line. The retaliation against A&E from individuals like Sarah Palin decrying Mr. Robertson's First Amendment rights is laughable. Mr. Robertson is not the victim of censorship by any stretch of the imagination. He is merely in disagreement with his employer's point of view and as such being removed from representing them. Thankfully the world is on a 24 hour news cycle and this farce of a news story will die quickly. There are far more important things in this world to worry about than a few off the cuff remarks from a closed minded individual that gathers his opinion from a book of fallacies that was created by the Council of Nicaea due to the monetary gains they received from Constantine in an effort to gain power. The Kardashians must be pissed this is stealing their press.

5928

I heard on the radio about an Arizona Department of Public safety officer that turned out to be an illegal alien after serving for 13 years. This wasn't just an average officer, but one that was decorated, and for a brief time a DPS spokeswoman. Well, in order to be an officer, you have to be a legal citizen, so the officer was fired. Even worse, the officer now faces deportation to Mexico, a place she doesn't even know. Apparently her mother brought her to the United States when she was small, forged her birth certificate, and led her to believe she was born in the US. Not knowing any different, she grew up here, graduated high school, went to the police academy, and became an officer with DPS. My personal belief on police aside, I think it is a shame that this woman not only lost her job, but now faces being sent somewhere she doesn't know. It's reasons like this why we need immigration change. I really don't wish deportation upon her, but as the law stands I don't see how you can't deport her. It wouldn't be fair to the thousands of others that have been deported under similar circumstances, although my gut tells me she will get a pass. That, is an even bigger crime. That tells people that the government can pick and choose your worth based upon your occupation. I don't know the answer, but I think if you were brought here underage illegally, but unknowingly, you should get a pass. You weren't the one committing the crime, but you sure as hell will be the one paying for it. I think as long as you are contributing to society, you have value, whether that be as an officer or even as a food service worker. Work is work, and all jobs need to be done. Hopefully this case will help ignite immigration reform. I know that there is talk of the Dream Act, but this woman falls outside it's scope as she is now 32 and past the 30 year old cut off the Dream Act has in place. That being said, I hope she doesn't get a free pass, I hope she is saved because we save all people in this situation. I agree that if you knowingly come here illegally, there needs to be a penalty, but I don't think we should pay for the sins of our fathers by losing everything we know.

6120

Listening to the radio on the way home I was pleasantly surprised at the responses I was hearing from the Millennials on the radio. A local talk show was asking if they planned to sign up for insurance now that Obamacare is in effect and the overwhelming majority said no. Now, without their buying into it, it is destined to fail as there won't be enough money to fund it. Most of the responses had to do with the fact that most were healthy and the cost was too steep. I have to say if I was still in my 20's I would probably agree. I am getting insurance because I have kids, but if it wasn't for them I would still probably pass. The reasoning being why should I pay several thousand dollars out of pocket for insurance, then have to pay for the cost of everything anyway until the deductible kicks in, when if I just paid out of pocket if I had to see a doctor I would probably be shelling out a few hundred at the most. Look, I think everyone should have access to affordable health care, but I don't think they should be forced to purchase it, nor do any of the options available in the marketplace make sense financially (catastrophic occurrences notwithstanding). It sucks for people to have to see in hindsight what I felt before Obama was elected. It was time for a person of color in the White House, he just wasn't the right person, and it's important for people to have insurance, but it shouldn't be mandated, especially at asinine costs. On a personal note, I've been contemplating going back to school. I'm tire of my position in life and a strong education is a great tool to have to help in achieving something better. I don't know if that will help or hurt my blogging goal, but I'm excited to see what is to come. Hope everybody is surviving the holidays so far, and I hope everyone makes it through the winter that has been dropped on Phoenix this week.

6264

As we all begin to take part in the festivities of the day, let us not forget what today is really about. Stores are now opening on Thursday to promote the commercialization of Christian mythology taking away from the spirit and meaning of what today is really about. I had originally thought about a diatribe against the machine for bastardizing the little time we get to spend away from work, but alas I am relenting and simply going to sum up today with one statement. Happy gluttony and football day to you and yours. May your day be spent getting seconds (or thirds, or fourths) between quarters, and naps between games. May your pants get unbuttoned whether your team wins or loses. And to those of you like me that have to work tomorrow, may inspiration hit you on things to do to your coworkers' desks while they are among the hordes of sheeple pissing away money on Friday deals that really aren't deals. Happy Thanksgiving

6504

Again I have to apologize for not blogging as much as I have intended.  Life has again brought upon me an obstacle that has prevented me from focusing on writing.  My wife’s beloved grandmother passed away this week. It had been expected for some time but still has put a crimp in the normal routine of daily life.  This isn’t the first loss of life for my wife’s family, but it still boggles my mind how their family copes with death.  I understand everyone grieves in their own way, but their family does so in such a compartmentalized way. My wife is suffering from the loss of her grandmother.  My mother-in-law is suffering from the loss of her mother.  When my grandmother passed, we didn’t individually mourn the loss of our own relationships with her, we, as a group, mourned the loss of Nannie Elizabeth Elvove.  I’m not saying either way is better, I’m just noting there is a huge difference in the process between the two.  Another huge difference between our families is the religious aspect of death.  The Catholic traditions my wife’s family upholds, are very somber, almost depressing.  There is finalization that is being expressed that is unfamiliar to me.  I remember when my grandmother passed, we all took our time to be sad, but it was brief and personal. After the initial emotional release, we celebrated the life that was, we didn’t grieve for what wasn’t there anymore.  While the physical presence of my grandmother passed, we (my family) never (at least from what I could tell) felt there was a void.  My grandmother has always been with us, and is still with us.  It is who we are, it is what she taught us, it is in the knick-knacks and trinkets we have collected over the years through, by, and for her.  She is still in my mom’s living room in the chairs that came out of her house.  She is still next to me.  I think the only way we every truly lose someone is if we forget them.  We have the power to make others eternal.
A second thing that came to me over the weekend appeared out of nowhere.  We were sitting around and my mother in law made a statement in regards to how men tend to be better with history and statistics than women.  When posed the question why, I simply stated sports.  Sports are ingrained in boys (or at least used to be) and sports are intrinsically history and statistics.  When you get involved in sports (not even playing, but from a fan standpoint) you compare the past to the present (history) and you use the players statistics to do so.  It doesn’t matter which sport you are involved in, all are basically a history and statistic lesson, which is why I agree than generally, men are better at history and math than women are.
Enough drivel for one day, back to the grind, back to reality. Enjoy.

6792

The past few days have been so busy I haven't had the time to write. Friday, my youngest reached a milestone, she turned 5. I've been caught up in all the wonderment that comes with celebrating a child's birthday. We had a party, we've had dinners, we spoiled the child. I'm ok admitting that. As a parent I want to give my child everything. We didn't so much cater to her material wants so much as made sure we spent time doing things with and for her and reminding her how special she is. I remember my mom doing the same for me, and it's a tradition I try to carry out with my kids. As an adult, I hate anything relating to my birthday, but for a child it's a nice reminder of how special and unique they are. I only have so many birthdays with my kids and I want to let them know how special they are to me each time.

6936

Today I’m a little sad as it would have been Pat Tillman’s 37th birthday.  Pretty much everyone knows who Pat Tillman is by now.  If not, he was a professional football player who gave up a promising NFL career to join his brother in the Army Rangers after the September 11th terrorist attacks. After several tours in Afghanistan, Pat was killed by friendly fire.  I remember sitting in a bar in Lexington, KY drunk off my ass when I heard of his passing.  Needless to say, it was a sobering moment.  Unfortunately the circumstances of his death were distorted by the US government.  It’s a shame that somebody that gave all was so disrespected by his own country.  While I didn’t personally know Pat, I knew of him long before he became a national hero.  Anybody that paid attention to ASU football in the mid 90’s knew from the first time they saw Pat how special he was.  He received the last scholarship ASU offered in 1994 and turned that into a stellar college career. His persona was polarizing and he was somebody that succeeded beyond everyone else’s expectations of him.  He was an undersized college linebacker and managed to become an overachieving NFL safety. The remarkable thing about Pat is if you ever hear anybody that ever knew him or met him talk about him, Pat the person is always mention before Pat the football player or Pat the soldier.  He was just a good guy. It’s sad to think that somebody like that was taken because I have no doubt that Pat would have gone on to do remarkable things regardless of whether he played football or not.  So happy birthday Pat, the world is a better place for having known you.

6984

I’m really not one to shove my philanthropic ideals down another person’s gullet, but I do want to mention what a great place Phoenix Children’s Hospital is and how appreciative I was seeing so many people out at the Swim & Gym festival this weekend.  The proceeds from the event all went to PCH.  PCH is near and dear to me as my daughter spent 11 days in there from October 31st to November 10th, 2010.  She had actually been in there a few days prior at the beginning of October for what was initially diagnosed as pneumonia.  Exhibiting the same symptoms Halloween morning, we returned but the diagnosis was much different.  Long story short she has gastrointestinal issues which are more than likely a lifelong issue for her.  The point here is not my daughter’s health, as she is doing just fine and is stronger than ever. What I would really like to convey is what a wonderful place Phoenix Children’s Hospital was in some of the darkest times I’ve had to experience.  The staff there was so accommodating, and made every effort to make the children feel like children.  Granted, while there you never forget you are in a hospital, they do their best to normalize the situation.  From bright colors, to a constant stream of children’s movies, to video games for the older kids, they go above and beyond to make life as comfortable as possible for the kids.  The big thing for us was they had wagons for the kids.  Those wagons were life savers for my wife and I.  Our daughter is not one to remain static, even while attached to myriad tubes, so she constantly wanted to be on the go.  Well the tethering to machines made moving a chore, but PCH had wagons she could be pulled around in.  We must have put 100 miles on the wagons pulling our daughter around every night to get her to fall asleep.  The nurses even joked about how she would be on her nightly rounds.  Well, when my daughter’s birthday arrived (she spent her 2nd birthday in the hospital), I went and bought her a wagon of her own so that there would be at least one more free wagon for another child.  We still have it, although it doesn’t get the use it once did.  Having to spend a birthday in the hospital was devastating to us, as you never want to see your child suffering, especially on a day where you are celebrating them.  The nurses threw her a party, and decorated her wall, brought her a cake.  It was so touching to have them trying to help make our little girl’s day better.  So, while I understand we all have causes that are near to us for various reasons, if you ever get the chance to do anything that supports PCH, I know it would mean so much to those kids.  Some of them may never leave, while other will suffer unimaginable pain while there, but the staff does it’s best to make each child feel as special, and normal, as possible and anything to help kids like that is great in my eyes, as I’m sure it is in the eyes of every other parent that has had to spend a night there.

7056

November has arrived signaling two months left in the year.  There is just something about November that makes me more appreciative of life.  While my industry sees a flurry of activity, for the most part the entire population seems to slow down.  Family gatherings are more frequent as we encroach upon the holidays.  Family to me though isn’t defined by relatives.  Family is those you keep around you.  I heard a quote once that “relatives you are stuck with, but you choose your family” and I couldn’t agree more.  So while I know that I won’t have the financial freedoms of years past, I am going to be more appreciative of the intangible things like time spent with my kids and friends.  I’m going to cherish the sounds of music (not Christmas music, I can’t stand that stuff), bask in the warmth of the Arizona winter, strengthen my connections with the outside world.  As we approach winter, which is usually associated with dormancy, I plan on being more active, if not physically, emotionally and spiritually, socially even.  I want to sow the seeds so that I have more in the spring to watch blossom, to carry me through the coming year until I can do it all again.  I plan on actively shedding the old so that I can grasp the new with vigor in the new year.  All that being said I would like to thank everyone for the feedback so far and look forward to growing and learning more from you as I continue my year journey of self-exporation.  While I haven’t been as consistent as I had hoped to be, I have come to learn life is inconsistent, but not in a bad way and for that I’m thankful.

7104

Sorry for the absence, life has gotten in the way.  That aside, another news story I heard on the way in got me irie as the Rastas would say.  I heard that New York is thinking of instituting a new age limit on tobacco, raising it to 21 from 18.  The fact that somebody is of legal age to fight in a war, go to jail as an adult, etc., etc,. but banned from something else due to age is asinine.  I feel the same way about alcohol.  If you want to put age restrictions on these things, make the legal age of adulthood 21, but don’t get butthurt when you lose a significant military and workforce.  (sarcasm)Obviously these people are not old enough to make their own decisions so we shouldn’t hold them to the same standards of everyone else (/sarcasm).  The second part is the fact they are considering legislation at all.  Have we learned nothing over the years in regards to legislation tell us what we can and can’t do?  People are going to do what they want to do, criminalizing it is only putting a larger burden on tax payers to cover legal costs.  Prohibition only increases criminal activity. Now if you want to increase education on the subject to help people make better informed decisions, I’d green light that.  Educating people to the potential harms of whatever they choose to do is acceptable, as long as that education isn’t forced.  However, given the information, if somebody still chooses to use tobacco, or alcohol, it is their right to and they will suffer the consequences.  People were given free will for a reason and the government should not criminalize that free will, with a slight few exceptions (i.e murder and crimes against children).

7296

I was listening to the radio at lunch today and one of the segments was about going green and how people would do it if it was convenient.  While I think that is a huge reason as to why people don’t, I think the biggest factor is the investment cost it takes in going green.  Of course utility and oil companies do all they can to prevent the switch to being cost effective, which given the nature of their business is justifiable.  This is where the government on all levels needs to grow a pair and stop caving.  I know it’s hard to say no when your pockets are fleeced, but this just further strengthens the argument that government doesn’t have the best interest of the people in mind. I’ve looked several times into solar electricity for the house, and the investment is ridiculous.  You would think everyone in Arizona would run off of solar; we have sun for 300+ days a year.  That’s plenty to keep batteries charged for the days where there is no sun.  Even in places that don’t have the luxury of that much sun, solar seems like a great way to at least subsidize regular energy consumption, but utility and oil companies would lose big money and they can’t have that even if it is better for the planet, not to mention other industries where the savings on power would be spent.  In fact, I’m a little surprised that we haven’t seen other industries champion solar power more as they would probably see increased profits from the extra expendable cash people had would be spent elsewhere. As I was sitting here typing this, I became even more enthralled with the idea of going solar/electric as in the event of a grid collapse, it wouldn’t be all that difficult to power your own house/electric car from home.  Everyone has used a magnet in science class to power a light bulb (or if you didn’t your school sucked), so taking that knowledge and just going on a larger scale in an emergency you would be able to live pretty normally for a short period at least.  The sun probably isn’t going anywhere (and if it does you have bigger worries) so your house shouldn’t be affected if the grid went out, and if you run an electric car you should be able to generate enough electricity using a little gumption and effort to be able to travel at least short distances.  I think this is one issue I really need to look at again, if not just from an economic standpoint, but from a prepper standpoint as well.  The idea of being self-sufficient as possible with the direction society is headed is one I think we should all look a little more into.

7392

I feel like I’ve been taking life a little too seriously the past few weeks.  Not that there is anything wrong with that because the world (or the US anyway) seems to be going to hell in a hand basket, but I know I have not been focusing on myself.  I’ve found a few distractions, but that is all they are.  Nothing I have done lately has been beneficial to myself and I think I need to actively focus more on things that will elevate me personally.  One of the questions I keep asking myself is “what do I want to do in life?”  Unfortunately I have yet to find an answer.  I know that from a work perspective I do not want to do the job I currently have for the next 30 years, yet I still haven’t found anything that interests me that will financially sustain my family.  Part of me thinks this might have to do with how small my world is.  Despite the fact that the world is more connected, that it is easier than ever to meet people and maintain relationships, I still feel like I’m in a fishbowl.  I know one of my goals is to move away from Phoenix.  I’ve been here for 30 years now and I’m ready to move on.  As of right now I’m targeting a move in the latter half of 2017, after my oldest daughter graduates high school.  The front runner as of now is the Nashville area, as my sister-in-law and her family are moving there next year and I know my wife will not want to move anywhere without family.  I’m ok with that.  That’s only a 3 hour drive from where the bulk of my family is and I have a sneaking suspicion that if I go that way my mom will follow as she has never liked Arizona and would like nothing more than to get closer to where she is from.  So now that I have a targeted date, a targeted area, and justification I just need to set in place the details.  All that being said, and me being a Gemini, I’m not cementing anything at this point as I could wake up tomorrow and change my mind.  I don’t think I will and every day I’m looking more and more into it, but still not committing to it so fully that I have no other options.  For the time being I’m going to focus on the money making aspect of life and figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

7416

I was listening to the news on my drive in this morning and heard something that totally set me off.  I am a few hours removed from my initial reaction and trying to think this through logically, but I’m still upset by it as it shows we are moving closer to a police state but now on a local level.  Incidentally, this has to do directly with the Phoenix Police Department.  The story said they department is looking in to issuing quotas for the officers to hit as far as issuing citations to show they are holding a stricter letter of the law.  Now while I get from a practical standpoint this is possible, it’s the theory behind it I find disturbing.  Let’s just assume for a moment that the police implement this plan and for the time being successfully meet their quotas by actually writing citations to citizens breaking traffic laws.  Let’s next assume that this has a positive effect and citizens begin to adhere strictly to the letter of the law. What is going to happen when there are no more violations?  I’m very skeptical of police work to begin with because its judgment based and then turned over to a court to prove or disprove.  Honestly, not everyone is going to judge the same way, even if they have received the same training.  This leads to long, drawn out court cases and expenses incurred by citizens all based upon the officer’s judgment at the time.  Needless to say, if the officer was having a bad day, it can hurt the citizen financially.  Now, if the police are going to have to meet quotas that gray area of judgment is going to get even worse as they will have to nitpick even more to reach said quota.  I just can’t fathom that this is going to be beneficial to the citizens in the long run.  People are going to be more paranoid and probably unjustly accused so that the police can get their quotas and that potentially will cause economic hardships on people who are already economically oppressed.

A second quip from the news story was the police chief asking “what would you rather have, an officer responding to a call or an officer out on patrol potentially stopping a crime before it happened?”  My answer is an officer responding.  Again, this goes back to judgment.  My response to that would be: read up on the Trayvon Martin case.  Just because I look a certain way, doesn’t mean the police should have the right to suspect me.  Until a crime is committed, there is no way of an officer knowing what the intentions are and preventative interference would be detrimental in the long run.  Most people I know are already suspicious of the police department and to be under constant scrutiny would not bode well to strengthen those relations.  What is that old saying?  “When you give up freedom for security you get neither.”  The directions we are going in scare me. Economically, socially….it’s a scary time but like the Romans did, the government is blinding the sheeple with new, shiny things promoted to enhance life.  Luxuries are dangled to distract attention from freedoms lost.  Be careful driving around out there.

7464

I’m now more convinced than ever that the health care exchanges set up under PPACA (or Obamacare as most of you know it) are a sham.   As I mentioned earlier, traffic was so busy Saturday I couldn’t complete an application.  So, I tried again last night, with, what I though, was some success.  I was able to enter all of my personal information, family info, wage info, etc. and submitted my application.  Upon completion there was a notification that some systems were down (big ups to Congress for this) and verification would take 24 – 48 hours.  Well this morning I had an email stating I had a message on the web site and to log in and check it.  Upon logging in it said I needed to complete my application and took me back to the beginning steps of entering my personal information.  WTF??  I am sure I am like most of you where you have a certain window to apply for benefits through work next year (aka open enrollment).  I’m also pretty sure that coverage through the exchange is probably going to be more than what it would be through my employer, but I’d at least like to see the rates.  This is getting ridiculous.  I think this whole exchange is a farce set up to fluster the public to the point they accept whatever coverage they can get out of fear of having to pay penalties next year.  The fact that employer sponsored coverage is so high, most Americans are going to have to seek social programs just to meet basic needs, thus the Obama administration will succeed in converting America to a socialist state.  Ok, I know that most of what I’m saying is out of frustration, but it’s pretty hard to draw any other conclusions.  I would be interested in hearing some success stories involving PPACA, but my gut tells me there will be next to none.  If you do have any luck, please share with the rest of us.

7488

Friday afternoon the information for open enrollment at my office began to roll out.  Obviously, the first thing I look for is what the cost of health insurance is going to be. Well, let’s just say I wasn’t amused with what I found out.  Not only are we switching insurance providers, the per check cost is going up about $69. That equates to an annual increase of $1794.  The increase is more than I paid for insurance for myself and my oldest daughter when she was born.  So much for affordable health care. Now I would probably calm down after a bit, if it weren’t for the fact that there is a $2000 deductible that must be met before insurance even begins to cover anything.  That’s per person, not for the whole plan. I think the whole plan is $5000.  So basically, I’ll be shelling out $11500 next year before insurance, which is required thanks to our great leader, even begins to cover anything.  I’m sure most people are like me, at a loss of what to do.  If I was making minimum wage (which thank whoever I don’t) that would be almost three quarters of my annual earnings. Disgusted with the situation, I figured I’d check out what Obama’s affordable health care rates were on his exchange, and lo and behold the system is so bogged down I can’t even get that far.  I think I gave up after 4 hours of trying to enter information on Saturday.  At least my ex would let me get a piece before she stuck it to me, Obama is like “bite the pillow, I’m going in dry.”  Its things like this that make me care less about what Congress is doing.  I know that if they don’t reach a resolution they are going to send our economy into the crapper, but hell, come next year when people can’t afford necessities due to the cost of health care it’s going to get there anyway.  Some days I wish I were more like the rest of the sheeple and had my head in the sand, at least the feeling of despair wouldn’t be so overbearing.  It’s also times like these that make me wish for some sort of catastrophic event so we are forced to reboot.

7536

Thank (insert your deity here or if you're atheist, science) for music. I don't know what I would do without music in my life. I've always said there is a song for every moment and a moment for every song. Even if I don't enjoy a particular song or musician, I can typically appreciate them. Music doesn't have to be complex either for it to be good, and it doesn't necessarily have to be good to be touching. Music has definitely helped me through life. Whether I needed to rage with some metal, get my aggression out with some gangster rap, or calm down with something acoustical, there is always some type of music that is just right. I'm so glad my views on music have changed over the years. As a kid, I typically stuck with one radio station and listened to that type of music. As I have gotten older, my tastes have expanded and I think I'm better for it. In 1990 I probably had nothing but rap music around to listen to. Now I have everything from ABBA to ZZ Top. I have bluegrass, country, rock, classical, opera, punk, rap, metal....the list goes on and on. I'll definitely say I'm not a fan of all music. There is a lot of crap out there, and honestly right now there isn't very much being made that isn't recycled or manufactured. That doesn't mean I'm going to stop listening though, you never know when the next revolutionary artists will arise. One of the things that I'm most proud of as a parent is that my children have had a wide range of music exposed to them. It has paid off. I'm constantly surprised at what songs my kids really enjoy and which ones they ask me to play. My older one is very into the early grunge stuff (albeit she did just confess to liking boy bands and has an affliction for Nikki Minaj) and my youngest loves almost any song that comes on and has a banjo, be it Taylor Swift, The Pistol Annies, or that song from O' Brother Where Art Thou? Another cool thing is that music has helped keep me bonded with them, especially my older one. She is doing a project for school on Blink 182 (probably her favorite band) but we basically sat down and had a discussion of the entire history of punk music and where they fit in. It was great. We hadn't had a conversation for that long in I don't know when. We talked about everything from The New York Dolls to The Ramones, The Clash, The Sex Pistols, The Dead Kennedy's, The Dead Milkmen, Operation Ivy, Rancid, and the evolution to pop-punk and where Blink 182 fit into all of it. I was amazed at her thirst for the knowledge and want to understand the history. I hope all of you get to experience something like that in your life. Music really is one of the greatest things and I'm so lucky to be able to share with not only my kids, but my friends. I love that they can turn me on to new stuff and I love talking about the stuff I already know and can turn them on to new stuff as well. Here's hoping your day is filled with music and that the bands never stop playing.

7584

I have to be honest today.  My mind is mulling over so many things that I can’t narrow down any one to really write about.  Today’s post might be the ultimate rambling of ramblings. So here are a few things running through my mind in no particular order and with no extensive arguments behind, but I’m open to discuss any of them:

I think our government sucks.  I’m not even choosing sides.  I think none of them represent the people as they should. I think people (and Congress is doing a fine example of this) are so concerned with their own wants and agendas, consideration for others is as at an all-time low.

I think we’ve become so advanced technologically speaking that we require instant gratification.  I think the populous has such a sense of entitlement that work ethics are horrendous. I think we promote this and accept it as being ok.

I think we make false idols for the wrong reasons (see any celebrity).  I’m not saying all celebrities are bad people, but I think we have built their pedestals for the wrong reasons.

I think we lack accountability for our actions.  We assume others will clean up our messes.

I think we lack goals.  So many things are attainable that we just expect them to happen instead of planning to make them happen.

I think music today sucks.  The truly gifted are busy working on their craft and are not seen where the people that lack soul are posting to the internet and becoming celebrities.

I think too many people are concerned with owning all the toys instead of playing with the ones they have.

I think that it’s a shame you can’t compliment a woman on her beauty without having a hidden agenda.

I think people are like the forest.  We spend far too much time conserving what is there that we forget that every once in a while you have to clear out the crap in order for it all to flourish.

I think people are more concerned with etiquette than they are with accepting facts.  We can’t ignore certain things to spare the feelings of others.  Doing so suggests those things never happened and by doing that they are doomed to be repeated by ignorance instead of being avoided due to owning up and facing the truth.

I think that is enough random crap for today.

7656

One of the things I know about myself is I tend to say a lot of things people view as inflammatory.  Sometimes I do this intentionally whether I truly believe what I say or not just to rile people up.  To me, if somebody is agitated they are going to tend to show their true colors.  For the most part on the internet, it’s that they are an idiot douche bag and very closed minded.  The other reason I do this is it leads to debates.  People defending their position give me feedback whether they know it or not.  I get insight into a person when they can rationally defend their view point.  That’s not to say I agree with them, but I respect a person’s opinion, even if I have to chide at them to get it.  All of that being said, I have to say the responses I get from posts I make on Google+ are by far some of the most intelligent responses to comment s I make.  I don’t know if this has to do with how I filter and share stuff, or if as tend to believe, there is just a more refined user base on Google than other social networks.  I don’t mean that everyone is refined, even the crude and crass (which I associate myself with) come off as more intelligent.  I guess what I’m saying is there tends to be more open-minded thinkers associated with G+ than with FB or even topic specific forums I’m on.  So for that, I’m very appreciative.  Thank you all (mostly) for being open minded and providing me with feedback that allows me to ponder viewpoints I haven’t naturally considered.  Also, not that what I say is “fake”, but please don’t always assume I’m not just playing devil’s advocate to illicit responses for my own growth.  Thanks again to all of you and I hope to have nothing but the continued positive growth that I’ve come to know on G+.

7704

There was recently a story about an off-duty police officer in Coolidge, AZ that wore his full uniform, including firearm, to school to drop off his daughter. The principal asked the officer not to wear the uniform again as it scared the other school children. The officer complained on Facebook, the principal recanted, and all the idiots online have chimed in their $.02. Now look, I'm all in favor of letting this guy wear his uniform to drop off his kid. We all get ready and are in our "uniforms" when we drop our kids off at school, no big deal there. However....(and this is where I've been getting jumped for my opinion)I don't think he should be allowed to wear his sidearm on campus while dropping his daughter off. In fact, I think he should be charged with carry a weapon in a weapon free zone. Hear me out. This guy was OFF DUTY, meaning he is just an average citizen like the rest of us. If I were to wear a firearm in a weapon free zone, my ass would be in jail. Look, I've made no bones about my distaste for law enforcement officials. I think for the most part (and this situation backs up my argument) cops feel they are above the law when it comes to their own actions. 90% of their reaction to situations involves judgement calls and 90% are unable to make a good judgement. The uproar I've heard about how the principal has gone too far, only cements the notion that officers are somehow not subject to the same rules and regulations as people that have chosen careers in fields not related to law enforcement. Additionally, as an office of the law, this gentleman should be more rehearsed in the laws than the average citizen and know damn well he was breaking them. /Rant let the flaming begin.

7776

I was having a conversation with a client of mine, and he brought up a point that I can't believe I never thought of. Life is going on even in spite of the government shutdown, so, do we really need the departments that aren't "critical"? It makes sense if you think about it. Why are we dishing out tax money to all of these agencies if we get by when they aren't working? Keep in mind I use the term working loosely, because anybody who has ever been in a government office or had to deal with a government agency knows they tend to move slower than evolution when it comes to getting stuff done. I think this would be a great starting point for a new wave of politicians to make big brother smaller. Unfortunately, it ain't gonna happen. That really is a shame though, we could used a streamlined, more efficient government. All that being said, I do feel for the people not getting paid, even though Congress is still collecting their salaries. I've always held a theory that the less you actually do in life, the more you get paid, and Congress is proving me right. On a personal note, I'd like to acknowledge my absence recently. I've been working on my life, and like a car that is in need of repair, sometimes it's best to tear it down and build it back up rather than keep patching things. I'm trying to do that so my internet presence may be somewhat diminished for a spell. It's not all bad though, it's allowing for personal discovery and healthy mending of relationships. It's also inspired me to revisit a few projects I've considered and put a more concrete foundation to them rather than keeping them conceptual. I don't know how far any of that will go. I think one of my major issues is I tend not to see things through, but again that's another thing I'm trying to work on.

7896

We have become a disposable society. We rarely repurpose, we want shiny and new. I see this all around me in my city. In Phoenix, we don't have old buildings. Once a place has run it's course, we tear it down and build something new. Look at our technology. We trade in cell phones once, if not multiple times a year. We buy new tvs and computers every other year or so. We keep cars for a few years and trade them in. We our losing our sense of history. Look, I get that things need repairs, or even remodels, but that doesn't mean we need to completely destroy something and replace it every time it needs fixing. Being somewhat of a gear head, I'll use cars as an example here. Shiny, new, techno filled cars are great, but the most beautiful cars are ones that have a history (and are still used, sorry, not a trailer queen fan). What the older cars lack in technology, they make up for in character. I think buildings are the same way too. New is nice, but everything new is identical to what the neighbor has. We are buying ourselves into autonomy. I can't help but think of the song Little Boxes (yes, the theme song from Weeds). They are all made out of ticky tacky and they all look the same. Moreso, I think we box our relationships into the same line of thought. Divorce is rampant because we lack the ability to repair and salvage. Just because something is broken doesn't mean it can't be fixed. Take some time this weekend to appreciate things for how they once were, reimagine them, repair them, rebuild them, repurpose them, reinvent them, but don't give up on them.

7968

The past few days I've been driving my wife's car to work and I put in a cd I had left in there that I had made for my daughter.  I didn't burn an mp3 disc for whatever reason, I just made a regular cd but I was able to put Neighborhoods and Dogs Eating Dogs by Blink 182 on it.  Under normal circumstances I would bounce around the radio, flip cds, play from my phone via bluetooth, etc, but for some reason I have found myself listening to the mash up of these to albums over and over.  The more I listen to them, the more I like them.  The songs just seem to resonate with me where I am in life.  It has been a while since I found an entire album (or in this case an LP and EP) that hit that mark.  In fact, I think the last time might have been Blink's Dude Ranch (for the record Dammit is probably my all time favorite song).  It's hard to explain, but I just connect with the music so well right now.  Now I know we all have different genres we prefer, different bands,etc., but I really wish I could convey how connected I feel to these albums.  Not only that, I wish everyone had an album they connected to as much as I connect to these.  I think music is such an essential part of life, for enjoyment, reflection, redemption....I think if I had one gift to bestow upon the world, it would be a connection between themselves and music, whatever their preference, not necessarily mine.  I'm pretty confident that these two albums will go along with me for the rest of my life, not necessarily because they will always have the same connection with me, but because I will know that at one point I was so connected to them.  If I could implore the people of the world to do one thing, it would be to get yourself a great set of headphones, and tune everything out but the music.  Listen to the different layers, feel the beat, hear the words...once you make a true connection it's an emotional experience.  If you have never had a moment like that, my condolences, if you have, then you know exactly what I'm trying to convey in this blog post.  I'm gonna run and put the headphones back on, hopefully you get a chance to as well.

Just for shits and giggles I'm going to post the lyrics and a copy of the song that really has me hooked right now.

"Pretty Little Girl"
(feat. Yelawolf)

Nineteen, your eyes are glowing to my beating heart
Oh, it seems like it is fine as my hand is moving up your arm
And you never really know where it goes up until it starts
I got my eye on you
What you gonna do

Day dream near a stream with the linear bites
Oh, I listen to the song on repeat from the other night
And I can't picture you but I sure got the feeling right
What a crazy world
Pretty little girl

And we wake from the night in a bed with a bruise
And we're laughing out loud over the craziest news
And you reached for my hand I was scared in your room
We fell on the floor and we started to move
And your hands were like birds as they flew from the coop
Up my back they would climb just as I came unglued

She said
If you break my heart then I'll change your mind
And I will do it again
If you play the part then I will play mine
And I will do it again
If we miss the mark if we hold on tight
We'll be there to try it again

Nineteen as we roll across the bedroom floor
Your eyes they cannot lie as you're dreaming of our future home
And the kids are growing up as you and I we are growing old
What a crazy world
Pretty little girl

In the rain with the drink from the back of the bar
I would raise up my voice, you would raise it up more
We'd forget that our lives being apart it is hard
We'd thought we were close but it still feels far
Can we learn to get by if we learn to have scars
If we learn to forgive and accept who we are

You said
If you break my heart then I'll change your mind
And I will do it again
If you play the part then I will play mine
And I will do it again
If we miss the mark if we hold on tight
We'll be here to do it again

[Yelawolf:]
Wait a minute hold up a second
Don't leave me here with this feeling
Like I'm the one full of regret
Like I never did good for us both
Like you never did pull out that weapon
And stick that knife in my back
Was I supposed to accept it
When your words are like
More than just sticks and stones
Kinda like a bullet
A hollow tip that lodged in my bones
And I can't just swallow it
My pride is more than all that I own
So I gotta give it away
And some of the times I'm all the way wrong
But can't you see past me and see my fucked up home
That made me the meanest, the devil is just singing along
To the song I write til I'm alone at night
And I hang up the phone and bite my tongue
Cause I know that me and you is just only right
But one one one one

It's a cry from the past we have been through a lot
Every year has been great and a few have been tough
And your kids they will reach for the stars up above
We'll sit and relax as we're cheering them on
The ropes to the light from the crib to the grave
We started alone in the end we're okay

You said
If you break my heart then I'll change your mind
And I will do it again
If you play the part then I will play mine
And I will do it again
If we miss the mark if we hold on tight
We'll be here to try it again

7992

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I want my legacy in life to be.  I think it’s important that we all leave a lasting impression, maybe not to the entire world as some have done, but to at least one person or a small group of people.  I don’t know that is the purpose of life, but I think we owe it to our future generations to leave something behind that they can either learn from or be inspired by.  I know the actions I have displayed during my brief time on the ride of life have not been what I would like my legacy to be, so it weighs on my conscious that I leave some positive to the world before I go.  I’m pretty sold on the fact that I will never invent or discover a life altering tangible item, so I think my legacy lies in inspiring. My first inclination would be that I would inspire my children to do something, not Earth changing, but something good for at least one person in the world altruistically. A lot of people do things quid pro quo, and while I agree that our brief time on this rock is our most valuable commodity and we should be compensated for it in some manner, sometimes we have to trade in that reward for the betterment of others.  It’s like our own butterfly effect.  We can do one nice thing for one person without expecting anything in return, and that could have a positive affect on myriad other people.  It gets paid forward. That in turn becomes our legacy, whether it is recognized or not, we have given a part of ourselves so that somebody else has a chance, a hope, a reason.  All too often, it seems we focus on people capitalizing on our good deeds.  I let that person in line in front of me and they won the lottery, it should have been mine.  Don’t think in those terms.  Think about how your generosities lead to easing the financial burden of somebody else.  Be inspired by the fact you bettered somebody’s life, not that you were cheated out of a better one for yourself.  Spin the positive and be inspired.

8064

Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like you are just spinning your wheels and not going anywhere? I'm totally have a days today. By the time all the bills are accounted for and the checking account is empty, it just feels like there is no hope for growth or change. It feels like a rut. The Monday through Friday routine is the same and then there is no funds left to do anything on the weekend. I have to remind myself sometimes at least I have my family, and I am working on writing. I do have that going for me. I'm not expecting that to lead anywhere, especially right now that I am unmotivated to continue the story I'm working on, but I do entertain the thought of publishing and making a little coin off of it one day to hopefully open up my life opportunities. I don't know, I could just be worn out from the week at work and letting negative thoughts creep into my head because I'm too tired to fight them off. Normally I escape by playing my guitar or bass, and even sometimes I play a video game or two. Those options have been shelved for the past few months due to this lingering hand injury I suffered during a brutal head butt from the cranium of my 4 year old who was being pissy about being woken up. I digress. I think I'm gonna go find something on Netflix to distract me for a while and hopefully re-energize my desire to write. Here is hoping you all have a fabulous weekend full of great music, football, and maybe even a boob or two...just in case I don't make it back to blog until Monday.

8088

I do apologize about skipping a day.  To be honest, it had less to do with lack of time and more to do with nothing to say.  I’ve been feeling a little uninspired the past few days, granted yesterday was a busy work day and that took a little out of me.  By the time the end of the day rolled around I was mentally shot.  I sometimes wonder how many more things would get done if people didn’t have demands upon them.  Throughout history it seems the great artists and thinkers weren’t tied down to a day job.  Artists have received endowments so that they could create and not be worried about the day to day.  The same can be said for some scientists too.  I suppose on the flip side of that though they were under great pressure to live up to expectations.  Perhaps that’s why the great artists always seem to be a little mad, or predisposed to addictions.  That being said, I wonder how many true innovators are really out there.  I’ll use music as an example.  It seems like every 10 years or so there is an artist/artists that arrive and completely innovate.  The 50’s had Elvis, the 60’s the Beatles, the 70’s pretty much sucked (as far as innovation), the 80’s had Michael Jackson, the 90’s spawned Nirvana, while 00’s had Eminem.  It seems like there is a revolution of sorts every so often then a gluttony of copy cats until the next innovator arrives.  Perhaps we are prone more to emulate than innovate.  Anyway, I’m going to keep this one short since it’s mostly a filler piece anyway.  Hopefully inspiration will hit me and I will get back to writing tonight as well

8136

I was perusing Facebook on my lunch hour today and ran across a photo a friend of mine had taken of a high school weight room he was subbing at.  The facility was great; it looked like an LA Fitness but with the schools color scheme and logo.  His caption was “the difference between east side and west side is evident” referring to the affluence of the east side of the Phoenix area as opposed to the lower economic status of the west side.  I made a comment on it, but I think it is relevant enough to expand for today’s post.  Basically I said, it starts at home, and I think we can apply this thought to everything.  In the case of the school’s gym, I said it starts at home because schools get money based upon taxes.  The amount the schools get is based upon property taxes.  Property taxes are based upon the value of the homes in the area.  The value of the homes is based upon what the home owners put into their home.  Now I know we can’t all afford to upgrade everything to top of the line, but by simply taking some pride in our homes and doing the necessities to keep them well maintained and in proper functioning order, we can keep the property values from dropping.  I know I’m painting a picture with a very wide brush here, but think about it.  If we each do our own part, starting with where we live, it benefits the community as a whole.  If we keep up on our homes, we increase the property value, but one home alone doesn’t do it. You have to rely on your neighbors to do the same.  Suddenly, a neighborhood is desirable and thus the property values increase.  When the property values increase, the taxes on the homes increase and more money is sent to schools.  Schools can provide more to the students and the students in turn have more opportunities for growth and can maybe find something they enjoy learning about and can turn that into a career.  When you like what you are doing, you work harder at it and get better, and can then earn more money.  That in turn, allows you to buy a better home, or invest in a lower priced one, but you have more disposable income to fix it up, thus increasing the property value, and the cyclical process continues. Now we have desirable communities with better educated students and greater opportunities.  Businesses will want to be where the people are, thus increasing job opportunities.  Infrastructure will be improved due to demand, and increased tax revenue due to higher taxes based upon higher property values and higher incomes.  The cycle continues and spreads.  See, the point I’m making is everything starts at home.  This is a small example but can be applied on a global scale.  The thing we as citizens have to start doing is taking accountability for our situations, then start helping others.  The pride, wealth, and satisfaction then trickle upwards and outwards.  Now, if I can figure this out, how come much more educated and powerful people (cough, Washington, cough) can’t figure this out?  Why are we wasting billions of dollars over seas and on ludicrous pork projects when the answer is so simple?  My guess is because Washington knows that the more we can depend on ourselves, the less we need the government and all their special kickbacks will disappear. The people will no longer be sheep, and government control will vanish.  So see kids, maybe mom was onto something when she wanted you to keep your room clean

8160

I’m beginning to realize that my goal of blogging every day is a far more monumental task than I had originally anticipated.  There is more that goes into than just typing a few sentences and submitting it for the world to read.  Not much more, but more nonetheless.  That made me start to think whether or not we realize how much is truly involved in the tasks we take on.  Take just driving somewhere for example.  You might have to go 10 miles.  The average person would probably think that 10 minutes is plenty of time to get there (my wife does this all the time).  People negate to take into consideration that that is under optimal conditions, which are never met in the real world.  If you have to be somewhere in 10 minutes, you have to take into consideration the time it takes to leave the house and get in the car, then you have to navigate the streets, which are never wide open, then you have to park, and finally enter your location.  Assuming there are no serious delays, you still never travel at optimum speed given acceleration, deceleration, etc.  Broad example I know, but what I’m saying is people don’t tend to consider the variables when committing to a task.  There is always more to a task, than just doing the task.  There is preparation and follow-up involved, pretty much no matter the task.  The thing that really bugs me is when somebody agrees to take on a task, but neglects to prepare and ends up late.  I think it is disrespectful to others, and their time, to make them wait because you didn’t plan properly.  I guess what I’m getting at is we need to be more mindful of the things we agree to do and more respectful of the time we take to do them as time is one commodity that you can never get back, be it yours or somebody else’s.  There will always be certain situations where you can throw out the clock, but make sure you are only throwing away your time and not somebody else’s

8208

Today I have been less than productive. So far I've managed to sleep until around 9, then in the two hours or so that I've been up I've managed to check my social networks, eat a breakfast of Greek yogurt, Mandarin oranges, and flax seed, and watch some sports on TV. Saturdays in the fall are made for college football. That being said, I found myself switching back and forth between the Nebraska/UCLA game and Chelsea/Everton Barclays Premier League soccer. Football was winning, but I'm finding myself getting more into soccer. I'm making an effort to become more global, and soccer is the biggest sport in the world. It was, however, something in the Nebraska/UCLA game that gave me thought for this post. As I was sitting there watching UCLA get ready to kick off after a field goal, you could hear Nonpoint's version of In The Air Tonight playing through the stadium loudspeakers. For whatever reason, that in turn made me think of my nephew, who is a freshman at Central Michigan, and a tweet he sent out the other day that said "college is 100000000 times better than high school." That made me think back for a microsecond before this thought flashed into my head: we spend far too much time comparing our current situations to the past. To carry that further we spend far too much time trying to replicate the past and not carrying on with our future. My wife for example constantly says "remember how I looked back when x? I'm gonna be that person again, that's my goal" and I think to myself, no matter how hard we try, we will never be the same person we where back then. Not a decade ago, not a year ago, not a moth, week, or even a day ago. Life affects us to that no matter what we do, we cannot replicate the past,even the most minute, microscopical change will never make us EXACTLY the way we were, so why do we spend so much time reflecting on it? I get the occasional walk down memory lane. I understand looking through photo books, and reminiscing, but the every day want that I see people have for the past seems like such wasted time and energy. If we put as much effort into thinking of our futures as we did our pasts, we as a society could be infinitely better, or at least further along. So as you all enjoy the rest of your Saturday, when you think back, don't do so with want, do so using what you've learned to better manage your future. As for me, I'm going to try and write some more. The positive feedback I got when I mentioned I was doing some writing really inspired me and as such I've almost doubled my word count. Unfortunately sometimes being a father/husband gets in the way and daily life interrupts the process. Please not, the key word there was try, as football is really calling my name.

8256

I have a theory that work only really gets done on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  Monday, you are blah and hung over from the weekend; there is no possible way to be productive.  Wednesday is mid-week and you need a break.  Friday you are ready for a weekend and can’t possibly do work.  That leaves just Tuesday and Thursday to get work done.  Today is the exception to the rule for me.  I have been really good the past few months about only drinking one coffee/energy drink a day.  I usually have one in the morning when I get to work then water the rest of the day.  Today though, I had to crack and get a Monster at lunch.  Now, I’ve also been really good about which Monsters I drink.  I stick to the Zero Ultra Monster. For me, it’s more about taste than anything, although the Zero Ultras have no calories, no sugar, and only 2 carbs per can.  I think the walk downstairs to the little store probably did more to wake me up than the Monster itself, but hey, whatever works right?  Now, there really is no moral to that story at all.  I had something I was going to write about today but completely forgot what it was.  I guess that’s the point, unpredictability.   Just because you plan on something going one way, you have to have a backup plan in case things go off course. In this instance, I forgot to think of multiple topics to comment on and therefore was left with nothing but fodder about an energy drink.  In the long run though, I’m hoping that blogging on the fly helps me develop my writing skills.  One of the things I seriously want to do is write a novel.  I’ve got bits and pieces in my mind, and I’ve actually started laying the foundation of the book I want to write.  It isn’t much yet, I think I have about 4,800 words written, most of which is just character development and scene setting.  That means I’m at just about 10% of where I need to be for a full-fledged novel.  Hopefully I can continue to work on it and if all goes right I’ll have the initial rough draft done around the same time this experiment ends, if not before depending on how much time I can devote to it.  Only getting an hour here, half hour there doesn’t lead to much actual productivity since I end up re-reading what I have written to get me back in the frame of mind to continue where I left off.   I’m really hoping the further in I get, the faster the plot develops and I can really get a lot more done.  I try to draw aspects of my life and what’s around me to put into the story I’m telling, so don’t be surprised if something you read sounds like something I may have gotten from one of you. 

8232

I just had the most surreal experience of my life. I just left work, turned right out onto Thomas Road heading east and stopped at the light at Central Avenue. Traffic was still busy but there was a break so I was able to swing out to the left hand lane as to avoid cars turning right at the light. At this point I was probably eight cars back from the intersection, but with east/west traffic at a stop for the red light I had a clear view towards the northwest corner of the intersection. Given I was stopped, I was fiddling with the radio, tuning in to hear sports talk. Once I had the station tuned and volume at an acceptable level to hear the on-goings, I looked up to check the light and see if it had turned yet. Just at this moment I saw a body flying hood level through the air about a foot in front of the windshield of what appeared to be a Prius. The body continued to elevate in an arc until it disappeared from sight due to the cars in front of me. It took me a moment to realize what I had seen. I just saw a pedestrian get hit by a moving car. Hard. I was in shock. I couldn't move for a second. People started running from the bus stop towards the impact site. Cars began to move and block traffic and a crowd formed around where I assumed the body stopped, which was a good distance south of the intersection. Keep in mind the pedestrian was crossing westward in the north crosswalk. The body had to have flown at least 3/4 of the way through the intersection which is 6 lanes wide, three each direction with no turn lanes at this particular spot. Assuming that the average car lane is 9 feet, the body had to have been air born for at least 40' and then judging from the crowd slid down the road at least another 40 feet. It was hard to see because of the stopped cars and crowds of people. I numbly proceeded onward as a) I only caught a glimpse of what happened, b) I couldn't have made it over with the number of people already there, and c)the shock of seeing what had just happened clouded my thought process. The last thing I remember was seeing his backpack still in the crosswalk as I drove on. I'm still having trouble processing this. It keeps replaying in my mind over and over and I keep hoping that this person will be ok but based on what I saw I can't imagine this doesn't turn into a fatality. I probably won't be ok until my family is all home safe tonight. People, keep you loved ones close and safe. Look out for each other because obviously people aren't paying attention.

8280

Rainy days and Mondays….yeah I know, sounds like a horrible 70’s song.  But Mondays do suck.  Rainy days, I actually like, but for whatever reason when you combine the two the whole vibe around you seems to change.  There is a definitely a noticeably different vibe in my office today which I can only attribute to today being a rainy Monday.  I have to admit, I feel a little down too.  It could be because I see no end in sight as to getting my car fixed, at least from a financial standpoint.  Couple that with what I can assume will be an astronomical hospital bill from my daughter’s accident Friday and well, feeling a little blue today seems justifiable.  Not looking for a pity party, but stating facts.  It isn’t going to end me nor do I sense an extreme case of despair, just another rainy Monday.
The plus side, and ultimate distraction for me, is that the 2013 NFL season kicked off this weekend.  Opening weekend is by far my favorite weekend of the year.  Every football fan is filled with hope and every team is at an even keel.  Unfortunately for some (cough Jacksonville fans, cough) this is the best it will get all year.  For others, it’s the beginning of a magical ride that will culminate in a Superbowl victory in February.  To everyone else, it’s a fantastic roller coaster of ups and downs, celebrations and cursing, congratulations and second guessing.  It’s also a time for everyone to wait and see how the Dallas Cowboys crap the bed this December.  The other great thing about football season kicking off is it’s a reminder that fall is nearly upon us. 
Fall might be my favorite season. Football aside, we start the string of pumpkin flavored everything and as such I had my first pumpkin iced coffee of the year from Dunkin Donuts this weekend along with a pumpkin donut.  Fall is also great because we start the shutdown of our year.  Holidays quickly approach and we begin to reminisce on the long road we have traveled and reflect on the hope that the New Year will bring.  The days begin to shorten and the weather cools (except for us here in Arizona, we have a few more months of summer). Traditionally we celebrate the harvest of the hard work of spring and summer, we feast, we fight, we reconcile, we carry on…we prepare to put to bed another trip around the Sun and ready for the next go round. 
So while the rain and Monday combine as a little downer, yanging that yin is the bliss that is another season of football and another fall to reflect upon the year that has passed

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My apologies for not posting yesterday, but I was a little busy. Most of the day was taken up with fallout from the short week, then around

I received a call from my daughter's dive coach that she had been injured at practice and was being taken by ambulance to the hospital. Needless to say, attending to my daughter was far higher on my list of things to do than a blog post. That being said, I'm almost concerned at my lack of concern for my daughter. Let me clarify that before you rush to judgement. What I mean is while I was concerned for her well being, I never once became distraught at the idea of her injuries being life altering. Even when I got to the hospital and she was laying there on a backboard with a neck brace on, did I allow myself to think of this as anything more than an over cautious approach to dealing with her. In retrospect I wonder if I should have been more concerned. I never tend to think of medical issues as ever being serious. Got a cut, bandage it up and it will heal. Broke something, put it in a cast and let it mend. Maybe this is just typical male thought. My wife was, not a complete mess, but close. She tends to think of worst case scenario. Is that just typical woman thought? I don't think it is, because growing up I never got that sense from my mom. I've been to the hospital numerous times with pneumonia in my life and never once was there a sense of urgency or that it was more than an inconvenience. I remember one time after I had moved out I got pneumonia and had called her for a ride to the hospital only to be dropped off. She didn't even come inside. Maybe it was because this had become such commonplace that we knew what was going to happen. Maybe there is just a sense of calm built into me from her, but I never once had a worst case scenario run through my head at the hospital. This is one I'd really like some feedback on from the readers. Are men just more calm when it comes to medical issues than women? Is that why guys tend to never go to the doctor whereas women seem like the walking versions of WebMD where everything leads to cancer? I'm using broad generalizations here, I know so don't read to far into the sexism. Maybe the divide isn't men and women, but do people tend to fall into the two extremes like that? I would like to know if that's just the way it is or if this is something I need to reflect more on so I can become a better parent and person.

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I’m taking the crux of today’s post from some comments made on Facebook.  Basically I stated I think the implosion of our country as we know it will stem from the arrogance of our leaders, and while the delivery method may be a foreign source, the root cause of the problem is from within.  What I mean by that is that we make our own enemies by interfering in the affairs of others.  We overstep our bounds, albeit more than likely for altruistic reasons, but we assume we know better than others how others should live. It’s almost an evangelical approach to life.  Just like Christians going on “missions” to convert indigenous heathens into the fold of God, we push “western lifestyle” and values on other parts of the world.  Now, I for one love the comforts that living in an industrialized society provide. I’m a techno geek admittedly.  The advancements that are coming every day in technology and medicine are remarkable.  However, to paraphrase Dr. Malcolm in Jurassic Park, we are “so preoccupied with whether or not (we) could that (we) never stop to think if (we) should.”  We have seen throughout history that conservation isn’t always the best recourse.  Look at the efforts in place to save certain species, which have led to overpopulation, which in turn leads to a lack of food, and because of the righteous efforts to save we have created misery among all.  People tend to forget that humans are just animals on this planet along with all the others.  Sure, we are the dominant species, but we are animals none the less.  We are arrogant in the face of nature.  We think we know better, but really what place do we have to dictate the grand plan nature has for us?  I know it’s easy to say when we are removed from the situation, sitting comfortably in our climate controlled abodes, with pretty much our every whim available at our fingertips, while the death and disease are far removed from our everyday lives, but you have to think there is some truth to it.  We have no problem letting our neighbors live their lives inside their houses, but we can’t let our distant neighbors in other countries live out their own lives.  It’s almost as if we are hypocritical by nature.  It probably all boils down to power, the most corrosive substance on the planet.  As long as we wield power, we have a feeling of superiority.  As long as we feel superior, we have no problem telling people how to be and what to do for their own good.  It trickles down too.  Leaders make laws for the population, parents make rules for their kids, older siblings tell their younger siblings what to do.  It’s natural, but it doesn’t make it right.  We will never progress as a species until no one person wields power over another.  Nature wiped out the dominant species before, and it looks like we are on the road to doing her a solid and taking ourselves out.  I hope I’m wrong.  I hope humans carry on, but I think it is going to take a major house cleaning in order for that to happen.  It is going to take far more suffering that we are willing to admit.  We are going to have to destroy ourselves in order to be reborn.  As much as it’s a great time to be alive it’s also a sad time.  Yin-Yang. Until next time

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I posted a question on both Facebook and Google+ earlier in regards to which is a more noble feat, serving ones country or being in your children's lives. One of the conclusions I came to is that circumstances will vary, and the choice is extremely personal. Now I will never begrudge somebody for having a different opinion on this subject than I do, but for me, being in my kids' lives is a must. Given my views on foreign policy I could never justify leaving my children for anything unless there was a clear and imminent threat to them. I know what it is like to have a father that was not always there and I could never leave my children. When I made the choice to become a parent, I took on the obligation of being there for my children no matter what. Children are only children for such a little amount of time. I couldn't imagine not being there when they need their daddy. As it is with my older child, I missed so much because I was not in a relationship with her mother after she was born. I do my best to make up for that, but nothing can replace those once in a life time moments, like first steps or first words. You can try to capture those moments on video or in pictures, but nothing replaces being there for them and I owe my children to be there to experience life with them. Again, no disrespect to the men and women in the military, I commend and thank you for all you do, but if you've made the choice to be a parent, then you need to be in your child's life as much as possible. Now (and this is where politics start to come into play), the argument can be made that protecting your country from the dangers in the world is protecting your children, and thus justification can be made for entering the military. However, I strongly believe that if we worried more about ourselves and less about policing the world those dangers wouldn't be so severe. Our arrogance as a country is what brings on the hatred from our enemies. If we maintained a strict policy of not interfering with the ongoings in other countries unless explicitly asked to do so, the threat to our way of life would be dramatically less.
So basically what I'm saying is if you mind your own business, and everybody else minded their own business we could all do right. Life has become far too complicated and we all need to take a step back because we've complicated it ourselves. To the parents, and I mean parents, not sperm or egg donors, or half timers, but to the full time parents, you are the heroes. I'll get off my soapbox now and prepare for the flack.

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+ Mike Sullivan was kind enough to mention me in a thread on Google + today. It was an interesting thread about vloging. I myself prefer to blog as it allows me to not only choose my words more carefully, but it also saves all of you from having to look at my face while I echo the musings running through my mind. You are welcome by the way. One of the themes though was history. Better yet, making yourself a part of history. The gist was by vlogging you were able to leave a record of yourself for future generations to discover. Basically, anything you put on the internet will remain forever (EMP usage notwithstanding), and I think that anybody, be it bloggers, vloggers, or any user of social media is in essence leaving a record of themselves for people to find. I think it's great. I love that we can basically record ourselves for posterity. I've recently felt the urge to search my roots and have spent many hours working on a family tree so that I can get a better grasp of who I am by looking at those that came before me. I wish there were more records of people to be found. I know not everyone has an interesting story, but everyone has a story, and just like books, or movies, it's up to the audience to decide how willing they are to invest themselves into following the story. I encourage all of you to blog, or vlog, or maintain a diary. You don't have to make it public, but it's a great way for future generations to look into their past and see where they came from, and who knows, you may be more entertaining than you think, but nobody will know unless you try.  A word of advice though, just reposting shit from Pinterest doesn't express who you are and is quite annoying. Please, don't be that person.

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Good Sunday morning everyone. I hope you are all enjoying your extended weekend thus far. I woke up surprisingly early for myself today and with everyone in the house still asleep I decided to jump on the computer and read about the world's goings ons. I also received a phone call from my father-in-law wanting some help with his TV. It seems that it had gone out and he is far from tech savvy so I agreed. He is always there to help us out and since his wife is bed-ridden I had no qualms about going to his place to help out. Turns out it was just in need of the power button being pushed on the TV. Simple enough fix, although this is all irrelevant to my post. The point is, I took the surface streets to his house instead of hoping on the freeway. I'm not sure what drove me to this decision, but I'm glad I did. It had been several months since I had taken the surface streets in this particular direction and I can't believe how many changes there were. New buildings had been erected, old one's had been torn down. The point is, change is constant and in the blink of an eye our surroundings can change without us even noticing. We get so wrapped up in what our direct objective is that we neglect to notice things that don't affect us directly until we look up and notice everything has changed. That is the part I hate most about living in a big city. Our environment evolves so much that we don't take time to realize or appreciate it. I never had that problem as a kid living in a small town. It's one of the things I miss most. It may seem boring at times, but you notice when things change. Even small, inconsequential things. Next time you are out and about, take a different route, slow down and pay attention. You might be surprised what you see.

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Good morning my fellow humanoids. I hope you are all enjoying the start to a long, relaxing weekend. I do apologize for not posting yesterday, it was extremely busy. That's the funny thing about long weekends, they are usually bookmarked by utter chaos. It's not like there is any less work to do, you just have less time to do it in. The day before is usually a mad scramble to get as much in as possible and the day after is usually filled with fixing all the mistakes you made trying to cram everything in before you left. I hope most of you are staying home, because travelling anywhere on these long weekends makes things even worse. First there is the traffic getting in/out of town. Then there are the crowds because everyone is on vacation at the same time. Long weekends really are a no win situation when you think about it. Sadly enough, for a majority of us these long weekends are the only time we really get any extra time off. Sure, most of us have vacation days, or as the corporate world is going PTO days. My company no longer offers sick and vacation days. We strictly have PTO days, which can be used as sick or vacation, no distinction between the two. I don't mind it. Having kids it's nice to know you have the time off to take if they get sick. I remember when I my oldest daughter was little there were times if I needed to take off to tend to her I was shit out of luck as far as getting paid went because the company I worked for stuck to a strict sick day policy. You couldn't use vacation days unless they were planned. Pretty stupid in my eyes. I mean, you offer the days, the employee should be able to use them at their discretion so long as it doesn't interrupt the flow of business. In addition, the best way to retain the best employees is by keeping them happy. All of the top companies know that. Technology has made the world a much smaller place and the large corporations need to understand they don't dictate all of the terms anymore. Employees can now work remotely and travel faster, they are no longer at the whim of whatever corporation or business is local. The control has shifted in a way. Of course, there is a yang to that yin in that other employees are just as capable of taking your place. There has to be a balance in the employee/employer relationship and the companies that thrive recognize that. Hopefully, if you have to work, you get to work for one of the companies that recognizes this.

Well folks, I do believe I have taken up enough of your time for a Saturday morning (at least here in Phoenix it's still technically morning). I'm going to go start my staycation by throwing in a load of laundry and possibly having a bowl of cereal. I'm really not sure, I'm loving the peace and quiet in the house right now and I don't know if I want to make too much noise while my youngest is still asleep. So while I try to decide how to spend my day, I hope you are making the most of yours. Again as always, I appreciate you spending your time reading my mind. Have a great day.

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What a day. I was busy as all get out at work, then on the way home my transmission decided to die.  Not my finest day to say the least. But, now I'm home resigned to my chambers, watching the news on a TV suspended from my wall, and writing a blog post from my cell phone. I love technology. Not only does it make life easier, it allows us to do things unimaginable to the generation prior to us when they were our age.  I remember coming home one day when I was five. I climbed down the steps of the bus, ran up the front stairs, stepped through the screen door and there was a strange man blocking the TV. I remember the horror when I thought I was going to be denied seeing Scooby Doo. Turns out this was the cable man and he was not hindering my afternoon delight, he was revolutionizing my life. Now after school, Scooby Doo works come in more clear and vivid than I ever thought imaginable. Flash forward to today and my daughter, who is a year younger than I was when I first experienced a technological revolution, watches any cartoon, video, movie, etc. she wants on a piece, of metal not a whole lot thicker than aluminum foil, with a piece of glass attached. I never on my wildest dreams would have considered that a reality at her age and here it is as common to her and her daily life, as is juice or Barbie. It is absolutely amazing that something like this exists. In fact I was reflecting the other day about how far we have come in just the past 10 years.  See, my daughters are 10 years apart. When my older one was my other daughter's age, we were constantly playing the same Frosty The Snowman on a VCR on the 19" TV that I had as the "big" TV in my living room. Today my four year old watches digital streaming media of pretty much whatever she can dream up, on a 47" TV ( that is considered average size by today's standards and weighs far less than that old 19" unit). She is only 10 younger and has pretty much missed the entire span of time where DVDs and Blu-Ray where the dominant technologies. I can't begin to think what will be common in the next 10 years (assuming we survive that long) and what will be obsolete.  I'm off kiddos, to enjoy all of the science fiction the surrounds me. Remind me to tell you why this could be the worst thing to ever happen to society at another time.

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So here I am, sitting in my new desk.  No view, just walls.  I’m disappointed, but not upset.  There was a huge furor over this move, so much so that the operations manager sent an email out telling everyone to calm down.  I guess people are resistant to change.  I guess they don’t realize life is change.  We all have highs and lows.  The greater the high, the greater the low.  I almost feel bad for people that have a solid life of consistency; they don’t know the exhilaration of the highs.  Granted, they don’t know the despair of the lows, but it’s the experience of the two that make you appreciative of the other end of the spectrum.  Think of amusement park rides, which ones are more fun?  The ones with the ups and downs, or the flat boring ride?  This correlates to my previous post about the rapids while tubing.   See how life intertwines? 
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I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge that today is the 50th anniversary of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have A Dream” speech.  Funny enough, the original speech didn’t include the dream parts, he was responding to a person in the crowd that told him to tell everyone about his dream, and thus began his sermon on equality.  While we reflect upon this great moment in time, we must also consider the fact we are potentially standing on the door step of the next Great War as well.  This goes back to my post on yin-yang.  There must be equality and with the remembrance of great hope we are faced with great despair.  Enough of my rambling for the day, enjoy yourselves.